EMMA DENT COAD IS BUCHAN'S FAIRY GODMOTHER!

Felicity?..... You shall go to the ball!

Imagine for a minute being in Felicity Buchan's position.  

Here you are, defending a thoroughly unpopular and disreputable Conservative Government in its dying days, your majority in Kensington is only 150,  

Labour's dynamic young candidate Joe Powell is winning round your voters and even the most favourable boundary changes have added extra  Labour voters to the seat.  

You would think it was game over.  

Except it isn't.    

Delusional enough to think she has a God-given right to represent Kensington and not content with being a mere councillor, Emma Dent Coad has decided to throw her hat into the ring and stand as an independent. 

See the LINK

Since yesterday a fundraiser for EDC  has been encouraging her supporters to cough up  £30K towards her campaign bill. 

In reality,  EDC has zero chance of winning as the seat is a two-horse race between Conservatives and Labour.

For all her left-wing posturing, all  EDC's parliamentary bid is likely to achieve is a split Labour vote, handing a victory against the odds to Ms Buchan and her party. 

HELP THE DAME SOLVE A MYSTERY

Who are these 'Champions'?

Can someone help the Dame?
In her last Update, Felicity Buchan showed a picture of a reception at the Commons for 'Kensington Business Champions.' 

Quite who these people are is a mystery.

This Conservative government has in its 13 years done nothing to reform Business Rates and the result is that just since 2018

British Retail Consortium says every week 23 shops/businesses  closed mainly as a result of Business Rates and 

Since 2018 6000 retail shops have closed.

Helen Dickinson, CEO of BRC says 'crippling business rates' were a major factor.

The Labour Party have committed to reform of Business Rates saying they hollow out town centres.

If Felicity looks about Kensington she will see for herself that her government's disinterest in reform has bashed the retail sector.

The reason for Conservative indifference is that small business has no voice or vote.

OSCAR WILDE TO SIT ON THE DAME'S GREAT GRANDFATHER!

The Dame, like our local patron of the arts, Cllr Elizabeth Campbell, loves to flaunt her avant-garde tendencies..... especially with someone else's dough

The Leader has decreed, in addition to spending close to £600,000 on the much hated Chelsea Green garden, a further £150,000 has been offered by Campbell. With the cost of the foundation, the cost soars to nearly £250,000 plus of our money putting this monstrous, brutalist Paolozzi depiction of Oscar Wilde on tranquil Dovehouse Green. And who is going to maintain it?

Charles Cadogan once told the Dame the Green was one of his favourite spots: he would be unamused by this dreadful metallic extrusion.... as would Wilde.

Now, besides the issues of taste and vulgar money spending, there is another problem. The weight of this lump of metal requires a deep foundation yet the Diocesan board says that the foundations cannot go deeper than 12 inches to avoid buried bodies.

Most councillors have terrible taste yet glory in the idea of being latter-day Medicis. 

For years the Council poured millions into third-rate Opera Holland Park until residents forced them to pull the plug.

This council has no business wasting money in this way.

As the Labour candidate, Joe Powell says, "The Council needs to sort its priorities'.

ROSE OUT: A VICTORY FOR THE PRESS AND THE PLEBS

Motormouth

Without the fearsome British press, Rose, Davies, and the entire useless board of Nat West would have got away with their disgraceful behaviour.

In France, ranks would be closed and the press squared. Life would have got on as if nothing happened.

We tend not to do it like that here.

You may not like Farage but he has shone a piercing light into the hypocritical behaviour of the financial community.

What has gone wrong with the UK consumer finance industry?

Senior leaders have been conned by a whole range of dodgy consultants looking to turn a bob or two dispensing nonsense advice. 

Non-Executive directors at Nat West have really fallen down on the job. They need replacing. The Government has 40% of Nat West so which NED's were appointed by the Treasury?

GREEDY BOROUGH STEPS UP ATTACK ON RESIDENT CAR OWNERS

Pity the old Dame as she hikes from her vintage Armstrong Siddeley to her not-so-humble dwelling wondering why it's so hard to find a residents’ parking space in Kensington and Chelsea.

The Dame's motor car

Not content with selling off residents’ parking bays to e-bike rental operators, with the unlikely justification that this will stop users abandoning them on the pavements, the Council and its officers have decided to allow anyone from anywhere to pay-by-phone to park in residents' bays for as long as they like. The officers peddle the fiction that there is plenty of space in residents' bays for all comers. 

Curious, then that they insist on not allowing residents of new developments to buy residents’ parking permits at all. 

Officers claim that residents have asked that residents' bays be made available to everyone because their tradespeople find it so hard to park. 

No mention of all the residents’ parking bays that are already suspended for basement digging and other “essential” works.

The Borough’s commercial landlords, of course, will be delighted with the improved footfall, now that people can drive from far and wide and park in residents’ bays.

In consultations leading to the decision to start this new money-raising venture, the Borough has, naturally, chosen not to consult the holders of residents' parking permits.

The Dame and her fellow residents could be forgiven for feeling despised by their Council and its officers.

ROSE OPENS UP

Today, Dame Rose issues a deep and groveling apology to Nigel Farage. She says she was wrong to gossip about Mr. Farage's banking arrangements with a journo. 

Davies...

Davies tells us despite his CEO breaching banking secrecy rules he has every confidence in her. Davies is leaving the Board shortly but maybe the Government-a major shareholder should kick them both out now.

One perceptive commentator said this: "A CEO of a bank has absolutely no business engaging in conversation with a journalist, or anyone else, about any of their customers not even to acknowledge that they are a customer, let alone infer they didn’t meet the bank’s wealth criteria, by pointing to the eligibility criteria on the website. She knew exactly what she was doing, she knew exactly what Jack would infer from it. She has to go. End of."

What happened to Farage could have happened to any one of us and even companies we own and run.

BUCHAN SEDUCED BY FRENCH CHARMERS!

 

Dame

In her update, Felicity Buchan talks about her trip to the French Embassy to celebrate Bastille Day. 

I expect, dear Dame, it's a day when your bejeweled fingers touch your elegant neck thinking of your noble ancestors who 'took the blade'.

Felicity claimed the celebrations were "a reminder of the enduring friendship and collaboration between our two nations. I extend my warmest wishes to all of my constituents, both French and non-French, as we celebrate Bastille Day recently."

I suppose she's trying to get the French vote here but what arrant nonsense the woman spouts. 

And why would her non-French constituents celebrate Bastille Day?

Over the years the French Government has gone out of its way to damage British interests in every possible way.

How dare Felicity claim that the French Government collaborate with us. 

They may 'collaborate' with the Germans but they certainly don't collaborate with us.

Yours fuming....

redacted

DAME DIVERSITY SCREWS UP

In days of yore a CEO of a major quoted company would have been asked by the chairman to resign for allowing a Farage type cock up to happen.

It matters not a jot whether one loves/ hates or is indifferent to Farage. What happened to him could happen to any of us.

What about the Dame? She could find herself unbanked and reduced to joining the Co-op Bank...

Anyway, Dame Rose decided to ask her PR department to draft a statement of such awfulness that most normal CEOs would have torn it up.

Rose is now putting lots of blue water between herself and the perpetrators instead of carrying the can.

"I am writing to apologise for the deeply inappropriate comments about yourself made in the now published papers prepared for the Wealth Committee." 

It is the bit in red that is telling....in other words, someone in HR will carry the can.

Rose? You are an utter disgrace.

"I would like to make it clear that they do not reflect the view of the bank."

OCCULT SYMBOLS ON ROADS...IS THE COUNCIL HIDING SOMETHING?

 

Dear Dame,

I do wonder if you get out and about in North Kensington much these days; I don’t think you have yet experienced the joys of witnessing the return of Gandalf and his many secrets, sacred Runes blessing our public footpaths!

If not, do please come to amble along the Westbourne Grove footpaths between The Turquoise Island public loos and the Ledbury Road junction, I’m sure you will be thrilled by such magical markings!

They come in all primary colours such as white, yellow, green, red and blue, and are composed of straight lines, circles, squiggles, triangles and rectangles. When some months ago men were digging up the roads to lay new internet cables, these runes appeared all over the footpaths along Westbourne Grove, Ledbury Road and others in the vicinity. 

How amazing! What do they mean? Are there hidden tunnels under our feet? Are little green goblins hiding beneath us? Do they tell the Elves where they are to meet? It is such an ongoing, prolonged mystery! 

Surely if the mortal men who had been laying cables had made these markings for a temporary time, would they not have used chalk so the rain would wash them away in a short time?  ...but, no, the markers used seem to be indelible!

I am assuming you know exactly who did this and what they were done for, but nothing is being done to clean the once lovely York Stone pavements, not just because there is no money left in council coffers to get Men and Women with hoses and brushes to scrub away these mysterious markings, but because you know something that you will not let on to anyone else.

Are we in mortal danger? Should we be vacating our homes and businesses?”

Redacted

Ledbury Road (south), W11 2AB   

SUNAK'S SADNESS

Having a coffee with an MP the other day the Dame made a very good point(yes, she's not shy.... that one).

The point was that Sunak is competent and smart enough to run a FTSE 100 company but that begged the question as to how many of his Cabinet colleagues would he employ. 

Certainly, not the likes of  Shapps, the Secretary of State for Business whose 'business' a decade ago was considered well dodgy.

So that's the sadness of Sunak...probably one of the cleverest Prime Ministers we have had in years but backed up by nonentities. 

He has nothing to lose by a massive overhaul and replacing the dire with younger and cleverer colleagues.

Incidentally, his piece in the Telegraph today about the miss-selling of useless degrees was spot on. 

The young are being conned by corrupt and greedy 'academics'.

THAT OSBORNE EMAIL...DIRTY OLD MAN

 

The Dame has been sent the 2,500-word email which very professionally impugns the honour of the Rt Honourable George Osborne: in fact, it makes him seem like a right dishonorable bastard.

The email has been written by someone with a deep knowledge of this unpleasant ex-Chancellor.

It really is the death knell of a corrupt, self-serving and ultra-greedy Tory Party.

Still, unless Blackrock fires him he will still be picking up his daily £13,000 plus all the other fees so he won't be on the streets.

But the Dame doesn't suppose he will be on the lucrative Speaker Circuit...... unless to speak at some seedy Salesman of the Year Dinner Award. 

THE GOVERNMENT IN MIND CONTROL MODE

Halpern

This Conservative Government likes to pretend that individual freedom is what it is all about. It lies.....

The sooner the Conservative Party is destroyed root and branch the safer we will all be! 

Let's hope the right sort of phoenix arises to replace it.......

Sinister-looking Professor Halpern runs an Orwellian operation for the government. It is called the Nudge Unit and advises Rishi on how to 'manipulate the masses'. 

Giving evidence to a Parliamentary Committee with the sex-mad Matt Hancock the Prof said Britons had been "drilled to comply" because "they now understand what the drill is."

To quote Anne Widdecombe there is "something of the night" about the creepy Professor.

Gleefully, the prof said it was easier to imagine the population would accept future local restrictions. 

He went on to defend fear-based messaging "in extreme circumstances" though failed to elaborate on what those circumstances might be. 

So, Felicity....what do you think of Professor Sinister's ideas?