RBKC To Appoint Honorary Recorder

Andrew Pierce of the Daily Mail, that deflater of overblown local government egos' wrote some months ago about Sir Cockell and his delusions of grandeur.......
“But it's his expenses as a council leader that are even more controversial.
There is the £115,000 Bentley, complete with number plate 'RBKC', which was intended for the 'exclusive use of the mayor'. Freedom of Information requests reveal Cockell claims to use the limo to 'save taxi fares'.
He spent £800,000 of the council's budget creating four 'ceremonial' roles, including a mace-bearer and two assistant mace-bearers, and decking them out in ruffs and silk coats - while other councils across the country are making painful, swingeing cuts.”

The Dame has just heard our Leader has a new 'ceremonial' initiative-one perplexing his colleagues and causing mirth amongst the officers; particularly those about to lose their jobs. Here goes....

Der Leader Cockell loves the low opera of Gilbert and Sullivan. As he idly hummed The Lord High Admiral a brilliant idea came to him-one which would re-establish the authority and dignity of his beleagured Council-now the laughing-stock of London. It was of such simple elegance he wondered why Mr Myers had not come up with it: after all it could create an opportunity for Mr Myers to 'clerk' the job and boost his £280k a year 'take'.

left: The Rotten Borough Honorary Recorder in full ceremonial rig

The quite peculiar suggestion was to appoint an Honorary Recorder and it was made to Full Council on 12 October. What is an Honorary Recorder and what is it for? It seems it is a purely honorary, ceremonial position (ie, you don't have to do anything but appear at a civic function in some ridiculous get-up once a year. Feathered hat or a wig, you might well ask?).

Now the Dame is really puzzled. She thought, 'we don't have a Court in the Rotten Borough so what would the Honorary Recorder get up to'....and would he need a new Bentley?

During the debate, some senior Councillors suggested it was so we could 'take legal advice' - despite the fact that many Cllrs are lawyers themselves, and there is a vast and well-funded legal department for that precise purpose. The best justification of the evening, however, came from none other than Der Leader himself, who gave a very interesting spin on Localism that should go straight back to Eric Pickles. Apparently, despite no one knowing what the role is for, or even having heard of such a thing, the Leader states that this is an example of 'Localism at its best'.

Priceless.

But the Leader's ambitions for ceremony and authority do not stop there. At the December Council meeting there will be a debate and decision made on the need to fill another gaping hole in the Rotten Borough's Court of Mutual Admiration: it seems we have an urgent need for a Lord High Executioner. Suggestions please, direct to the Leader (though you will find he may already have someone in mind). '