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Tuesday, 17 December 2013


Like Her Majesty, the Dame keeps a close eye on the domestic offices of her own Holland Park 'palace'. 
Thus imagine her fury at seeing one of her staff 'laying up' the giant faux Tudor fireplace with copies of the latest edition of the £300,000 a year Royal Borer. 
It seems that the Royal Borer-far from serving its proper purpose of puffing up the egos of certain senior officers and councillors, is being used as a fire lighter!
A furious Dame demanded the immediate presence of her major domo, Mr Phelps. 
The Dame, being a soft hearted old thing, had given Mr Phelps a job to assuage her guilt for having 'fingered' him for circulating revolting emails to fellow councillors.
"Phelps, why are you allowing staff to use this important council communication for lighting the 'Yuletide Log'?" demanded the Dame. 
"Dame, no one ever reads it...though when I was editor it embodied a certain wit and erudition: now it serves no purpose, apart from giving Mr Fizzypatrick of PR and his team something to justify their £500,000 a year running costs".
The Dame was perplexed....why would a cash strapped council spend all this money on a load of old tosh no one reads.....


  1. Wasn't this kind of Council "communication" one of things Pickles was supposed to put paid to? Another one of this government's promises that failed to materialise!

  2. Imagine what a caring compassionate Council could do with £500k!

    Something far more useful than put out second rate propaganda like this I'd wager.

  3. The Royal Borer and its ilk are vestiges of an earlier time that need to be jettisoned as soon as possible. The Council has been forced to cut costs and it is completely baffling that it prefers to do so by cutting essential services rather than the likes of the Borer. Yes, some communication with the public is essential, but the Borer crosses the line between essential and the extravagant far too often.

    Just take a look at the latest issue - just how much of that is essential? Virtually none of it. You could probably reduce the essential information to two pages, if that.

  4. Using the Council's propaganda efforts as kindling is far too generous. Hamster bedding might be a more appropriate use.


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