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Sunday 21 July 2013

THE DAME GOES CRUISING AND RECRUITS AN ASSISTANT

SS HORNET......READY TO CRUISE

There is a heavy somnolence about our great Borough as well heeled inhabitants decant to their Oka furnished Tuscan 'fattoria' for a month or two of limpid living.


The Dame is also taking a well earned break. She plans a month on SS Hornet, cruising the Med and dropping anchor to catch up with louche friends in Portofino and Capri.

Returning later in the summer, the old thing will have a useful new 'aide' to supplement her useless nephew, Ludo.

Ludo's sister, Bernice, fresh from a third rate Swiss finishing school (and waiting for a place at the Florence Academy of Fine Art) has agreed to become a partner in the Nest!
Bernice is full of ambition for the Dame's little venture. 
We can expect lots of innovation and hard hitting stories.

Bernice tells her aunt she plans a 'radical design overhaul' and the 'exploitation of social media' to 'reach out' to the younger and 'switched on' elements of the Borough.

She says she also plans to 'edit' the Dames's output....what a cheek!

The Dame wishes her dear readers a peaceful summer....
Expect only intermittent communication.......

15 comments:

  1. Dame....a bit of editing might not be a bad idea.
    Bernice seems a 'live wire'. Will we be able to see a pic of her....she sounds glam

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  2. The Dame is to be commended, and she may rest asssured that during her process through the Med. the residents of the City of Peterborough, (who are already looking through Kensington Street maps with envy....) will keep an eye on both sets of councillors on their toes. Your readers may keep up with the scandal by a quich copy and paste of our feedburner link: http://feeds.feedburner.com/ParkFarmNeighbourhoodNewsTel01733345581PeterboroughcambridgeshireUk.

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  3. We have just heard that leading the migration to your great city is our ex PM, Pooter Cockell. Pooter, having been frozen out of the leadership, is now short £70k pa and needs to move to low cost housing we plan to build in the banlieue of your fair city. Juliian.....please keep us abreast of your swarthy Neopolitan leader, Dom Mario Cereste: he looks not to be a man to mess with...... on THE DAME GOES CRUISING AND RECRUITS AN ASSISTANT

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  4. Bernice sounds very bad news. The young too often lack staying power and the Dame needs to be mindful of her constituency. Gentlefolk of a certain age with standards - and no messing with the "here today gone tomorrow" brigade. And of course absolutely no tolerance for the nouveaus

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  5. "Reach out". "Switched on elements of the Borough". Please....

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  6. There can be few Dames left cruising the Med during the summer months in the traditional style of SS Hornet - a steamship with all the bells and whistles. What a treat to imagine this, compared to the vulgar gin palaces of the Russian thieves and Arab despots

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Follower Of The Dame21 July 2013 at 11:05

      I hear that Baker, now in his 28th year as the Dame's skipper, is considering retirement. He coped well with losing a leg 18 years ago and his hearing never really recovered after the firework calamity off Capri in '94. But of late gout has confined him to quarters for most of the day and he only just manages to take cocktails with his owner at the customary sun downer time. Basgallop was being groomed to take over (the Dame considers that he is exceptionally smart looking) but he was recently poached at an eye watering salary by Abromovitch for a role that is not entirely defined

      Delete
    2. Basgallop has taken over as Security Chief and Special Assistant on MV ECLIPSE

      Delete
    3. Frequent Guest21 July 2013 at 11:50

      Captain Baker still has 20/20 vision, a wicked sense of humour, and of course he knows everyone. The Dame has upgraded the computer systems on SS Hornet so that the boat pretty well drives itself.

      Delete
  7. Yacht Inteligence Services21 July 2013 at 11:19

    http://www.businessinsider.com/photographs-roman-abramovich-superyacht-the-eclipse-pier-90-new-york-city-2013-5?op=1

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  8. A radical design overhaul of the Hornet is not necessary. Leave well alone. It is dangerous, mischievous and pig headed to interfere with nature. Would the Dame please send Bernice to Business School which will take the menace out of circulation for a few years

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  9. £ for £ the Dame may not be able to match the jumped up peasant Abromovitch but she certainly has it on style

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  10. The last time I came across a "Bernice" she was a smart and well dressed young lawyer from Norton Rhodes. However her judgement and advice was air brushed from the Simpsons. A dreadful experience. The Dame needs to be careful not to wreck the Hornet with useless family members

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  11. Thank you all for your kind and supportive comments. Rest assured the Dame will be keep a close watch on Bernice. Yes, her yacht is a thing of beauty and the 'equipe' who crew the Hornet as it glides along the Amalfi coast are fit young men.
    Many of you will remember the provenance of the SS Hornet. Once the property of a Turkish president it was gifted to the Dame's third husband, the arms dealer. But as Bernice says. ' Aunt H....don't go there please.'

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  12. I am delighted to hear that Bernice is joining the Hornet and look forward to many jolly tales from the nest!

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