Friday, 9 May 2014

COUNCILLOR 'BENTLEY BOYS' SEEN TONIGHT IN THE ONSLOWS

THE ONSLOWS
Most of the dear old Dames' distinguished readers will remember how she stopped Pooter Cockell riding around in the Mayor's Bentley like a big time tycoon.
Imagine the Dame's blind fury when her old friend, La Duchesse de Rive Gauche et Droit, called the Dame from her Onslow Square triplex(not as grand as La Dame's)
COUNCIL'S CRUISER
"Dame, I thought you should know that I have just seen your friend, Lord Pooter Cockell, 'avec ses councillor copines' in the new Bentley"
The Dame will be having a word with young Mr Holgate, our Borough Town Clerk. 
She wants to know what Pooter and pals were up to. 
Pooter is not allowed to be in the motor car without His Worship, The Mayor.
She hopes no electioneering was going on.....or was it just a boys night out?

10 comments:

  1. Fly Swatter10 May 2014 at 07:32

    The reptile just cannot resist the Bentley. It is like a moth to a flame. The Dame is right to flag that he is not entitled to use the Council Tax funded transport of the Mayor. Tax payers did not shell out for the car to be used by a failed fag salesman. Pooter Cockle needs to be stuffed back into his box

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  2. Anonymous10 May 2014 at 07:35

    Cockell knows that he is a busted flush. Why does he not just fade away quietly? There is no future for him in Hornton Street. He was fond out.

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  3. Anonymous10 May 2014 at 08:26

    Cllr Cockell at the Bentley again. Saving taxi fares.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous10 May 2014 at 08:31

    Cllr Sir Merrick Cockell is mediating between the Royal Brompton Hospital and the Royal Marsden Hospital to try and find a solution to the vexed question of land use. He is holding the balance between two huge hospital egos and needs all the help that he can get. Arriving in the Bentley, exactly one minute late in order to be noticed, helps greatly to establish presence, authority and gravitas. It is a shrewd negotiating tactic.

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    Replies
    1. Fly On The Wall10 May 2014 at 08:32

      Sir Merrick has confided to friends that when he arrives in the Bentley it charges him up and boosts his self confidence. His performance is better as a result.

      Delete
    2. EX CLLR LAMONT10 May 2014 at 08:50

      Sir Pooter is a 'petit homme' so the Bentley helps elevate him.
      08:31 you are being horribly ironic.
      The thing is this: come May, there is a risk he will be seen off by the Chelsea Inde's and so he is desperately hoping to pick up some little jobs.
      No more Fat Duck dinners for this chump

      Delete
    3. BARRY PHELPS ESQ10 May 2014 at 08:52

      08:32 are you suggesting the Bentley helps cure his erectile dysfunction issues?

      Delete
  5. Anonymous10 May 2014 at 12:29

    You really should show some respect for Sir Merrick Cockell. He is a knight of the realm, and as such deserves the occasional benefit. Nobody really cares if he benefits by a few hundred thousand pounds over the years, or uses the Bentley for his own use. He needs these perks to help serve the community.

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  6. Anonymous11 May 2014 at 07:38

    I once came across Cockle and entourage out canvassing. He greeted me. I asked why he had failed to reply to my recent letter. He claimed to have done so. I told his councillor-footman that his master was lying. Cockle's letter arrived two days later.

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    Replies
    1. Fly Swatter11 May 2014 at 09:42

      Pooter is well known for telling porkies. Has done ever since he was at school.

      Delete

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