THE DAME THINKS THE WINTER FUEL ALLOWANCE IS FOR WINTER CRUISING!

The Dame  tends to pass the winter months cruising aboard her luxurious, but elegantly understated steam yacht, SS Hornet. 
Even for the Dame cruising comes expensive, so imagine her delight when her dodgy steward and ex mayor, the old reprobate, Mr Phelps, popped his head around the stateroom door to announce the Dame had received a £200 Winter Fuel Allowance from nice Mr Cameron. 

FUELLING SS HORNET

Mr Phelps had to put the poor old Dame right. The silly old thing was labouring under the impression the fuel allowance was to keep SS Hornet steaming. 


Imagine her fury on finding it was to heat her enormous Holland Park mansion. 
But it got the Dame thinking....did she really need the money? Clearly, the answer was NO. But, she was loath to return it to Mr Cameron....after all he would only waste it on some silly scheme or other.... 
Instead she had a better idea....
There were a number of councillors, she mused, who cared about residents having a tough time. 
Why not hand over her allowance to one of them so they could help those in real need?
Off to the top of head she thought of Cllrs Gardner, Dent Coad, Wade, Borwick or Mills.
Of course, there are others: councillors who take seriously helping their residents having a rough time, so the Dame suggests passing over the Fuel Allowance to one of them.
£200 can go a long way....